Story Time
by beebopkat
Summary: This is basicly just fairy tales that have been TMNTified! From Little Red Riding Hood to the Warlocks Hairy Heart come read my fairy tale parodies! If you like you can also request a fairy tale for me to TMNTify! Yay come my fans and we shall eat rainbows and butterflies! This is all for fun and giggles and all that.
1. Snowhite and the Seven Dwarves

**Yo people, this is basically Tmntified fairy tales! If you have any fairy tales then I can try to make a TMNT version of it! This is just for fun and it's sort of cute I guess….**

_**April O'Neil & the Three Dwarves**_

Once upon a time a young red headed girl was walking in the woods with the huntsman, Dogpound. Her name was April O'Neil and she was the princess of a kingdom and lived with her stepfather and her stepsister, Karai. April did not know that Karai was jealous of her and that she was ordering Dogpound to kill her.

The two walked further and further into the woods, it soon began to get dark and the princess grew worried.

"We should turn back." April told Dogpound.

Dogpound tightened his grip around her wrist and she looked into his eyes to see that he was crying. Dogpound, the fearless huntsman was crying, how could that be and why?!

"I am so sorry April." He whimpered.

"What have you done? Why are you sad?" April asked sacredly.

"Your sister Karai has ordered me to kill you."

April tried to pull her hand away from Dogpound but it was no use.

"Can't you just say I died? Couldn't you let me escape?"

Dogpound shook his head sadly and explained that Karai also wanted April O'Neil's heart as proof of her death. April wracked her brain for a solution and told Dogpound that he should cut out a pig's heart and present it to Karai as April's heart. Dogpound agreed to follow the princess's plan and her let her escape. April ran into the forest, it was now night and she could hear the howls of wild beasts and hoots of nocturnal raptors. She ran blindly into the dark woods and eventually fell asleep at the base of a tree.

As the princess was asleep three dwarves walked home from working in the mines. The eldest dwarves name was Leonardo and he wore a blue shirt with white pants, the second oldest was Raphael he wore a red shirt and brown pants and the youngest was Michelangelo who wore an orange shirt and green pants. They walked towards their little cabin in a line but then Raph saw something.

"Hey guys, do you see that?" He asked his brothers.

"See what, a pink platypus puking rainbows and candy?" Mikey asked.

"NO you moron!" Raph yelled. "Look over by that tree."

Raphael pointed towards a big oak tree and at the base of it was a sleeping girl with red hair wearing a yellow dress. The three dwarves circled around her.

"Who is she?" Leo asked in awe.

"It Gretel!" Mikey exclaimed. Michelangelo wasn't exactly the smartest of the dwarves.

Raph hit the back of Mikey's head and yelled. "You moron, that's a different story and Gretel was with her brother."

"Oh."

"Do you think she's dead?" Leo asked.

Suddenly the girl began to stir and she awoke. She yawned and rubbed her eyes and then she realized the dwarves who were watching her.

"Who are you?" She gasped.

"I'm Michelangelo!" One dwarf grinned.

"Raphael." The other waved.

"And I'm Leonardo, who are you?"

"My name is April O'Neil and I'm running away from my sister Karai, she had tried to kill me."

"Well, maybe you could stay with us." Mikey said.

April's eyes sparkled with happiness; she really didn't want to spend another night in the woods with all the animals. Leonardo didn't want to disappoint the young princess and either way the woods were not a good place for a girl to live so he said that she could live with them. The dwarves then led April O'Neil to their little cottage in the woods.

Meanwhile Dogpound was presenting the pig heart to princess Karai while hoping she thought it was her stepsister's heart. Karai held the smooshy red organ in her hands and studied it then suddenly she threw it at Dogpound.

"You fool!" She screamed. "This is not April O'Neil's heart, this is a pig heart! Where is she you worthless mutt?!"

"She ran away into the woods, surely she is dead though, there are wolves, bears and many other unpleasant beasts out there." Dogpound whimpered.

"We shall see." Karai muttered as she looked into her mirror

"Mirror, mirror." She chanted evilly. "Where is April O'Neil now?"

Karai's reflection grew blurry and then replacing it was a little stone cottage in a forest. Clovers surrounded the house and some vines grew on it but it looked very cozy.

Karai grew enraged that her stepsister was still alive, she yelled at the huntsmen and called many things. She decided that she would have to take things into her own hands.

The next day at the cottage April cleaned up after the dwarf's breakfast unaware of what Karai knew. After she was done cleaning the dwarfs pestered her about what chores needed to be done while they worked but eventually she shooed them away.

"April." Leonardo said before leaving.

"Yes?" She sighed thinking he'd give her yet another job.

"Don't open the door to anyone but us and don't talk to strangers."

"I won't." she promised. "You know how the old saying goes, stranger danger."

Leonardo smiled and said goodbye before joining his two younger brothers. When the dwarfs left April set to work she cleaned the dishes, sweeped the floor, dusted the house, raked the yard and even did the laundry. When she was finally done with the thousand chores the dwarfs had given her she sat down by a window and sighed. In the chair she heard a voice so she looked outside to see a little old lady with boxes of pizza yelling pizza for sale, pizza for sale.

Oh, April thought as the aroma of warm food beckoned to her, I haven't had pizza in such a long time.

"Old woman, old woman!" She called forgetting all about Leonardo's warnings.

"Me?" The old lady asked.

"Yes you, you are the only old lady I see here." April replied.

The old lady came to the window and coughed. "You are such a pretty gal; might I have a glass of water?"

April O'Neil let the lady in and handed her a cup of cold water after the old lady finished the drink she said. "You are as kind as you are pretty, as an example of my gratitude you can have a piece of pizza for free."

"Thank you." April replied as the woman reached into a box and handed her a steaming piece of cheesy cheese pizza.

April O'Neil's taste buds watered and she took a big bite into the pizza, at first it was delicious but then it began to taste sour and yucky. April found herself not able to speak and she had trouble breathing, everything went black.

The old lady cackled and threw her wig off revealing that she really was Karai.

"I am finally the best kunoichi!" She yelled as she left the cottage. "Hahahahaha!"

The dwarfs returned home to find April O'Neil lying on the ground, they rushed towards her.

"Is she dead?" Raphael asked.

Leonardo felt her pulse but it didn't beat and her skin was pale, he nodded sadly.

"We must cry then, in times like this we cry." Michelangelo whined.

"No, April O'Neil wouldn't want us to cry." Leonardo replied.

"Then what do we do?" Raphael asked.

"We'll go put her in the mountains so we can see her everyday and so that the birds can sing to her."

"That's a good idea, can we cry now?" Michelangelo asked.

Leonardo nodded and the three began to sob.

Prince Donatello walked into the cave exhaustedly, he had been hunting a white stag but he had not yet managed to catch it. He sat on a rock hoping there would be no bats in the cave. As he placed his pack on the ground he saw a stone table with a red haired girl on it wearing the most beautiful white silk dress ever.

Wow he thought I am thinking there are bats in this cave when instead there is an angel.

Donatello walked to the girl and saw how pale she was, was she dead? Worriedly he shook her gently, she didn't stir, he shook her again yet she did not wake. He stared at her miserably, why did he have to fall in love with a dead woman? He tried to wake her one more time even though he knew that she would probably not awake for death is unreversable. This time though when she shook him she coughed and sputtered and eventually spat something out.

"Oh my lady you are alive!" Prince Donatello cheered as he helped her off of the stone table.

"Who are you?" April asked.

"I am Prince Donatello." He replied. "What is your name?"

"I am Princess April O'Neil and I was dead, I think….or at least a bite of pizza got lodged in my throat."

"April O'Neil will you marry me?" Prince Donatello asked.

"Oh, I don't know what to say." She replied shocked.

Then Leonardo, Raphael and Michelangelo lumbered into the cave and then they saw April O'Neil. They raced towards her yelling April your alive! They all hugged her and told her how much they had missed her.

"So, will you marry me?" The prince asked after the dwarfs calmed down.

"I will." April replied.

**So that's the end and yes I know real marriage does not work out that way but it's a fairy tale so don't be a hater be a ****believer!**** You can ask me to do certain fairy tales and I will try. By the way I thank my theater teacher because some of these parts are from my Snow White play, I was a dwarf which is a bit funny because I'm 5 ft 3 in and that's tall for 12.**

**By the way I also have a book called Dover a Werewolf [YODA: **_**Read you must in order not to go to the dark side] [**_**SHREDDER:**_** Join the dark side, we have cookies!] {**_**ME:**_** I like cookies}**_


	2. The Warlocks Hairy Heart

**Look who's back, Bebop's back! I love slim shady's songs…On with the book!**

_**The Mage and Her Hairy Heart**_

There was once a young, beautiful mage named Karai, she noticed that when her friends all fell in love they made fools of themselves; they lost their dignity and would play about as if they were children. The young mage decided that she would never fall in love, not if she would have to act that way.

Karai's family laughed at her and what she had decided, they all thought that one a day an attractive young man would catch her fancy.

Despite what her family thought Karai's fancy was never caught by any young man. There were many men though that had proposed to her, all failed to have the mage love them. She remained happy all alone, she liked the fact that she had not fallen in love like all her friends.

Soon her friends all had children to but she just sneered, she thought they were all whining brats. She observed the young parents around her as they tried to do something for their children.

"Their hearts must be husks." She sneered. "Shriveled by the whining demands of their offspring."

Once again Karai found herself proud that she had not fallen in love with anyone.

Karai's parents aged and eventually died but Karai did not cry or mourn instead she considered herself quite lucky for her parents had left her their castle. She roamed the empty hallways alone now. Once she had transferred her most beloved treasure into a locked dungeon, she let her servants take care of all her needs, she lived a life of relaxation and plenty.

One day as she walked alone she heard two of her servants talking and she listened to them.

"You know I feel bad for her." One servant said. "She has great power yet she loves no one."

The second servant jeered. "How can such a woman with a castle to her name and so much gold not attract a single man?"

Those words sent dealing blows to Karai's pride. She would marry a man, a man better than all other men. He would posses great charm, wit and desire in every lady who laid their eyes on him. He would also be of magical lineage so that their children would inherit magical gifts and he would have wealth at least equal to her own, so that her comfortable existence would be ensured, despite the additions to her household.

It could of taken the mage an eternity to find a man like that but the very week after she decided to seek such a man, a man answering her every wish arrived in the kingdom to visit his family. He was a warlock of great skill that also possessed much gold. Every lady who laid eyes upon him wanted him to be theirs, that was every woman except for Karai but since he was the man she sought they began to meet. Karai told the man he had exceeded where others failed.

The young warlock whose name was Leonardo was both entranced and disgusted by the mages attentions. He could feel the cold layer like a slab of rock behind her flattery; he had never a woman so strange and remote. Leonardo's kinsfolk however said that she should get to know Karai better and made him go to a great feast that was in his honor.

It was truly a terrific feast, the table was covered in silver colored silk and all kinds of appetizing food sat upon it, the minstrels sung of love and the guests danced with their friends and family. Karai told Leonardo about her love to him even though it was all false and she was really just reciting bits and pieces from poems she had read before.

Leonardo listened to the mage's words intently and said. "You do speak quite well Karai but I sadly cannot be sure if you even have a heart, I would be delighted by your intentions of marriage if I knew you had a heart."

Karai smiled and told Leonardo to follow her; Karai led him from the feast, through the lonely hallways and into the locked dungeon where her greatest treasure was hidden. The dungeon was empty except for one thing, a table in the middle of the room with a basket on top of it that held Karai's beating heart. The heart had long been hidden from eyes, it had never been touched by anybodies love, and it remained cold and unloved. Leonardo was afraid of Karai's heart for it had shrunk and grown wrinkly and it had course black hair growing on it.

"What have you done to yourself, put it back where it belongs!" Leonardo begged.

Karai listened to Leonardo and slit open her chest and shoved the hairy heart back into the empty cavity that had not been occupied for a very long time.

"Finally, maybe now you shall feel real love!" Leonardo cheered happily as he hugged her.

The touch of Leonardo's strong arms around her body, the sound of his own warm beating heart and his lovely rose like scent was all new to Karai and it pierced her heart like a sharpened kama. It felt so strange to Karai to feel again, she had been blind and in darkness for such a long time.

The guests and hosts of the party realized that the mage and the warlock were absent after quite a while. At first they were untroubled but eventually they grew apprehensive and searched the castle for Leonardo and Karai. After searching high and low the guests decided to search the dungeon, an appalling sight awaited them there.

Leonardo lay on the cold stone floor with his chest cut open and beside him was the mad mage and in one of her hands she held a smooth, shiny, scarlet colored heart. Karai stroked and cradled the heart as she muttered about exchanging it for her own. In her other hand was a tanto knife. She cut a hole through her chest and tried to coax the hairy heart out but the heart was stronger than she was and refused to diminish Karai's senses or be returned to the basket it remained in for so long.

Before the frightened eyes of her guests Karai vowed never to be mastered by her own heart and then hacked her heart from her chest with her knife. For a few seconds the mage felt triumphant and then with a heart clutched in each hand she fell beside Leonardo's body and died.

**Sorry about that story if it was a bit too bloody for some people…..**

**This is a parody of the story The Warlocks Hairy Heart by J.K. Rowling and can be found in the book The Tales of Beedle The Bard. J.K. Rowling is the author of the Harry Potter series.**

**Truly sorry if that was too bloody but it is one of my favorite non classics.**

**A kama is a Japanese weapon that looks a bit like a mini scythe and take it from me those are really sharp and a tanto knife is a pretty big Japanese knife.**

**Any story requests? Feel free even if you don't think I know them, you might be surprised!**


	3. Rapunzel

**Sorry this took me a while, haven't been to the library in a while. By the way my Beauty and the Beast parody could take a long while because for some odd reason it is stressing me out but I really want to do it so the beebopKat shall! By the way my Mikey match is an Oc and that is the same thing for Raphael most of the time, Mike's Oc will probably be a bit like me but braver.**

_**Ember**_

Once upon a time there lived a human girl named Ember; she had beautiful long red hair, pale skin and stunning grey eyes. Ember was a very curious girl who had a knack for getting into trouble, big trouble.

Ember lived next to a superlative garden that was owned by a witch named Karai. The garden had all types of plants, apple trees, lilac bushes, mull berry trees; there were even clusters of pink lady slippers! In the garden also lived beautiful animals, tiny humming birds the color of rubies, giant butterflies with colorful wings and fat lazy bumblebees that droned happily as they picked up pollen. The problem though that Karai never let anyone into the beautiful garden.

One day Ember being the curious girl she is climbed up the fence that separated her from the garden. She silently walked up to a mango tree once she was inside and ate the juicy fruit, that mango was the best she had ever eaten, with her every bite her taste buds quivered and she soon devoured the fruit. Ember wanted even more fruit so she reached up and took more but she gobbled that one down so she took another but that one disappeared into her stomach just as quickly as the last, soon Ember had eaten all the mango fruit!

Now that she was done eating she tried to crawl back up the fence but she couldn't! Then the witch jumped out of a bush and she was fuming. Ignoring Ember's sorry pleas she dragged her to a tall tower with only one room and locked her in. Karai came everyday to see Ember in the tower and when she came she would chant "Ember, Ember you ate my fruit and you look like doggy poop so let down your hair!"

When Ember let down her hair Karai climbed up to the tower. Every day she came and every day Ember begged for mercy and freedom but Karai kept her locked up.

Ember hated the tower, she had no space to be active and all that energy inside of her built up, she really wanted freedom. Sometimes when Ember thought she just might lose the small bit of sanity she had she would listen to the birds outside sing and she would sing along with them. Ember wasn't exactly interested in the small birds that came around she liked the birds of prey better; she liked to listen to their exciting tales of hunts and places that they had visited.

A young prince named Mikey was strolling along one day when he heard one of the eagles mention a young girl who sung with the birds. Mikey had to know more about this girl so he asked the eagle where the girl was. The eagle told him that she was locked up in a tower so Mikey ran to her rescue without a plan just like any lovable noble idiot would do.

He soon came to the tower and heard the girl sing with the small chickadees and finches. Mikey was anxious to meet the lovely girl that the eagle spoke of and he was good at climbing but when he tried to climb up he slipped back down because the walls were as slimy as frog rubbed snail mucus. Since Mikey could not get in he hid and waited.

Later that day Karai came back to the wretched tower that kept the prince from Ember.

"Ember, Ember you ate my fruit and you look like doggy poop so let down your hair!" Mikey heard Karai chant.

Ember then lowered her hair and the witch climbed up to the tower to torture Ember once again.

Once Karai left Mikey said. "Fire, fire, moot shoot hey look its flappy bird!" but nothing happened so he tried. "Look, look I am amazing." But once again nothing happened so he tried. "Ember, Ember you ate my fruit and you look like doggy poop so let down your hair!" and Ember lowered her fiery red heir so Mikey could climb up the tower.

Ember told Mikey all about how she had gotten stuck in the tower and how she thought she might die if she couldn't go all hyper crazy psycho outside. After hearing about her problems the prince wanted to set her free but he didn't know how to. Soon Mikey had to leave but he pinky promised Ember that he would come back and find a way to free her so she could go all hyper crazy psycho.

That night Ember went to bed early, she could not wait for tomorrow to see Mikey again! The morning of the next day dragged on and on yet Mikey did not return, had something happened to him?! Ember stared worriedly out the window and sung to the birds. When peanut butter jelly time came she began to think that Mikey would not come at all but then she heard him chant and let him climb up.

When Mikey was in he explained to Ember that he had an idea that was so amazing it was genius! Mikey had Ember call to the birds of prey and when they came he gave them a blanket to carry then him and Ember crawled into the blanket, the birds would carry them away to the ground!

As the birds took Mikey and Ember away the witch came to the tower but she did not notice that Ember was in the sky!

"Ember, Ember you ate my fruit and you look like doggy poop so let down your hair!" Karai chanted so Ember asked a bird to snip her hair short and threw it down at the witch!

From that day on the prince and Ember lived happily ever after and Ember kept her hair cut short because it was just like way better that way.

**I am so BOSS because this is an awesome Rapunzel story!**


	4. The Old Man and the Turnip

**Yay a story from when I was two or three or four, YAY!**

_**Raphael and the Turnip**_

There was a mutant turtle named Michelangelo that decided to try his hand at gardening so he planted a few turnip seeds even though he had no idea what a turnip was.

There were days when the sun shined like a sun should and then there were days when the rain fell because gravity told it to fall. Since that was the perfect combination needed to grow plants the seeds began to prosper and grow. All the turnips sprouted and grew just like good little turnips but one of them grew and grew and grew even when the others stopped to grow. Soon it was the size of a car!

One day Michelangelo decided to pick the turnips so he went out into the garden and went to pick the car sized turnip. Mikey tugged and pulled and yanked but the turnip would not budge. Mikey tried a few more times but with no success, the turnip was just to big so Mikey asked his older brother Donatello to help.

Donnie held on to Mikey and Mikey held on to the turnip and they tugged, pulled and yanked and they shouted but they still couldn't get the turnip out! So Donnie asked his brother Leonardo to help.

Leo held on to Donnie, Donnie held on to Mikey and Mikey held on to the turnip and they tugged, pulled and yanked but the turnip did not pop out! So Leo asked Sensei Splinter to come and give a hand.

Sensei held on to Leo, Leo held on to Donnie, Donnie held on to Mikey and Mikey held on to the turnip and they all tugged, pulled and yanked but the turnip was being bolshie [**Look in a dictionary] **so it stayed put. So Leo asked April to help.

April grabbed onto Sensei, Sensei grabbed onto Leo, Leo grabbed onto somewhat jealous Donnie, somewhat jealous Donnie grabbed onto Mikey and Mikey grabbed onto the turnip. They tugged, pulled and yanked but the turnip only loosened a bit.

Raphael who happened to be passing by pushed everyone out of the way and with one wrench he heaved the turnip out of the ground.

That night Sensei Splinter made turnip soup and served it to Raph, April, Leo and Donnie but when he came to Mikey, Mikey said. "No thanks Sensei but I'll stick to pizza, it seems to be more agreeable with me."

Then everyone face palmed.

**I honestly love myself for the end…..I'm full of myself now I think….**


End file.
